POSTAL FLOODING

Letters

Mail Aggression

Gail Sheehy, dangerous because of her considerable skill as a writer and polemist, seems to be the latest in a line of middle-aged women seeking to persuade older men to stagger away into useless retirement ["The Unspeakable Passage— Is There a Male Menopause?" April], Underlying this advice is the clear assumption that, as they age, men must eventually lose their status and power long before they reach the end of their lives. "Proof" that this is inevitable lies in the fact that, with age, men do lose various physical abilities, including, in some cases, the youthful phenomenon of instant, repeated, and invariable erections.

But Sheehy's assumption is wrong. Of course, as we get older we cannot run a hundred yards as fast as we used to, regain an erection as rapidly, or fight as well with swords. But we can control the fastest runners, delight women of all ages in ways young men have yet to imagine, and win battles far more significant than any fought by hand. Patience, you counsel? Was the 65-year-old Winston Churchill patient when he thundered, "We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender"? Were Konrad Adenauer and Charles de Gaulle, when in their 70s and 80s, less determined and effective at resuscitating their nations than some youngster would have been? Who created the phenomenal technological advances of the past 50 years, may one ask ? Who created the miracles of a global economy ? Who fostered the educational, social, and medical conditions that made it possible for women to emerge from the tyranny of kids and kitchen and start to take their rightful place among the power elite? Who, for the first time in the world's history, put a stop, perhaps forever, to wars between nations? Men. Men who are today aging but who remain strong, virile, knowledgeable, and wise. Men who have no intention of developing patience or subservience, weakness or a wimpy acquiescence. So what if we cannot always get an erection?

"Male menopause" is a new, femalegenerated myth in the making. The idea that older men should disappear gently into the twilight because they cannot copulate as vigorously as they once could is wrongheaded and pernicious— designed only to emasculate and weaken our gender. It should be promptly and utterly debunked.

PETER H. ENGEL Los Angeles. California

In Gail Sheehy's fine piece on viropause I find no reference to the fact that Mother Nature, that great actuary of us all, says, in effect, "Hey, man! At your present age, your life-expectancy numbers and the years it will take to raise and care for progeny don't compute. Ergo, I'm cutting you off!''

This unwelcome point on the continuum of the male's passage through life should be understood, wistfully deplored, but accepted as the way things are. The end is still far off.

As for me, in my 30s it was like an iron bar. Today, in my 70s, I can bend it easily, so I'm getting stronger! Onward.

BILL MOSS Miami, Florida

EDITOR'S NOTE: In "The Unspeakable Passage." Robert L. Sind uas misquoted. His reference to 'TO million. . .unemployed." "three million" of whom were in middle management, referred to both men and women, not men alone.

Shudderbug

I work in the medical field and find your photo of the cadaver head—complete with flowers sticking out of it—the most revolting thing I have ever seen ["An Eye for the Forbidden," by Richard B. Woodward, April], I have not been able to read the rest of this issue for fear of viewing, once again, this dreadful page.

Your description of this as art of "sublime beauty" is absurd. Do you think that the person who donated (one hopes) his body to medical science would have done so if he had envisioned this grisly display of his remains?

Please, in the future, spare us this macabre "art."

STEPHANIE BARDEN Newport Beach. California

You do a disservice to Joel-Peter Witkin and lessen our understanding of this brilliant, gentle artist and his wit by not quoting from his most recent "wish list" of subjects to photograph, which includes two key items: "Anyone claiming to be God. God."

JOHN JOSS Los Altos, California

Unfinished Business

T. D. Allman has incisively captured the essence of the crisis in the former Yugoslavia ["Serbia's Blood War," March], In the absence of courage and determination from international leaders to stop Serbia in its tracks, Slobodan Milosevic has indeed proceeded with impunity in his campaign of ethnic genocide aimed at creating a "Greater Serbia." Ironically, what he has created is a pariah state condemned by all world organizations and leaders. Still, he continues. We in Kosovo find ourselves next on the Serbian hit list. President Clinton, like his predecessor, has pledged U.S. military intervention if Milosevic follows through on his threats. Regrettably, once Milosevic moves against defenseless Albanians in Kosovo, a bloodbath will ensue in which perhaps two million will be slaughtered in record time—before the U.S. can even get its planes into the air. To prevent that fate, we need many more humanrights monitors and U.N. or NATO peacekeeping troops dispatched to Kosovo now, before it's too late.

DR. BUJAR BUKOSHI, Prime Minister Republic of Kosovo

I have known Katharine Graham for many years, and knew her parents, Eugene and Agnes Meyer; I also knew Phil Graham. The account as published ["Portrait of a Marriage," by Carol Felsenthal, February] is filled with gossip, and fails to take into consideration various factors. It was common knowledge in Washington at the time that Eugene Meyer was deeply happy to have his brilliant son-in-law take over the burden of running The Washington Post, because none of his children showed any interest in doing so. Your story depicts Phil Graham's aberrant behavior as his true nature when in fact it was dictated by manic-depression— he could neither realize nor help how he behaved.

Why is it so odd that Kay Graham and her children were so devoted to Phil? They had many wonderful years together. Kay played a supportive role typical of women at the time—that she understood the full force of her husband's illness and behaved accordingly shows her strength and her love for her family. Lastly, it is absurd to describe her as having been some kind of mouse both in appearance and character. This was, and is, a tall, slim, attractive woman, extraordinarily well-spoken and intelligent. Her capabilities were always there; all she needed was an opening to show them.

INA GINSBURG Washington, D.C.

Letters to the editor should be sent with the writer's name, address, and daytime phone number to: The Editor. Vanity Fair, 350 Madison Avenue. New York. New York 10017. The letters chosen for publication may be edited jor length and clarity.