Tour de Farce

It's been 25 years since This Is Spinal Tap lugged the big-bottomed rock of David St. Hubbins, Nigel Tufnel, and Derek Smalls onto the screen, and the band is keen to celebrate—just as soon as they find enough corporate brands to fund their arena reunion tour. "We want to be the most heavily sponsored group in the history of rock 'n' roll," says Smalls, the bassist famous for his improvised solos on "Jazz Odyssey." That could take a while in this economy, so the trio's real-life alter egos—Michael McKean, Christopher Guest, and Harry Shearer—are kicking things off this summer with an acoustic concert series titled "Unwigged, Unplugged, and Undead." There are also plans to release the film on Bluray and place a song (may we suggest "Nerve Damage"?) in a new video game. MICHAEL HOGAN sat down with the boys from Squatney and This Is SpinaI Tap's director, Marty DiBergi (who bears a striking resemblance to Rob Reiner), to talk about the anniversary, the new tour, and the triumphs and travails experienced by rockers of a certain age.

MICHAEL HOGAN:Would you say that the film had a positive or negative impact on 4^ the hand?

AL DAVID ST. HUBBINS: I would say both ™ A positive and negative. Positive in the r sense that people heard of us who had not. Moviegoers heard of us. And negative— people thought we were crap.

M.H. David and Nigel, how has your relationship developed in the 25years since the film came out?

D.S.H. Now that Jeanine is out of the picture, everything's fine. He never got along with my ex.

NIGEL TUFNEL: Their breakup has been great for us, because I've seen him a bit more. My interests have changed. I've been breeding miniature horses. The very small ones—even smaller than the Mongolian horses, it turns out. And trying to find a business venture where I would race them. But I'm trying to find jockeys that are basically 26, 28 inches tall—and that's been a problem, actually.

D.S.H. I've been managing acts. I was really excited by the success of some female tribute bands, AC/DShe and Lez Zeppelin. So I've gone out on the road with some bands: Girl Jam and R.E.Emma. And we're branching out into the oldies field with Blood, Sweat & Cramps.

M.H. Derek, you once described yourself as "the lukewarm water" between David and Nigel's "fire and ice."Is that still the case?

DEREK SMALLS: I think we've all gone a bit lukewarm in the intervening years. It's the magic of age.

M.H. How does Spinal Tap stay relevant after all this time?

D.S. We never were relevant. That's the key.

N.T. You can't chase relevance. You can't be wed to it. You can't look at it like a religion. If you look in the mirror and see it, you've made a mistake. That's your first mistake.

M.H. How does itfeel to have influenced everyone from Metallica to Flight of the Conchords?

D.S.H. Anyone who was touched by us in any way, we deny it.

M.H. What would you say is the average age of the Spinal Tap groupie in 2oog?

D.S. It's not the age, it's the circumference that's worrying.

N.T. We have a code when we're doing a show, when women come backstage. We'll look at each other, with a sly look, and David will say, "Six." And that's the number of teeth they might have.

M.H. How come there has never been a Spinal Tap sex-tape scandal?

N.T. We tried. There was no interest.

M.H. Have you thought about updating your look—maybe getting a makeover for the new tour?

D.S.H. I actually grew this beard. I've authored a self-help book. And they won't let you appear on the cover of a self-help book if you don't have facial hair.

M.H. What's the name of the book?

D.S.H. It's called BYOM: Be Your Own Me. Don't be my you. Be your own me. And also, don't be sad. That's the main message: take your sadness and shove it up your ass.

M.H. What would you say are the influences of the Spinal Tap sound?

D.S. I would say that a great and unrecognized influence on our sound has been sonar. A lot of our records, if you have the right system, you can hear messages to marine creatures.

MARTY DIBERGI: You had a big whale following there for a while, right?

D.S. No, that was just the groupies.

M.H. Can you explain the sponsorship strategy for the new tour?

D.S. We don't want there to be a single square centimeter of anything that is not covered by a sponsor.

D.S.H. We want to make NASCAR look like—

D.S. The public library.

N.T. Right down to our guitar capos, guitar picks. Everything will have some sort of message saying MONEY,

M.H. And that's because ... ?

D.S. This is the new rock 'n' roll. This is the new phase of rock 'n' roll. It's all for sale. Buy it.

M.H.Does that make you sad—a lost ideal of the 60s?

D.S.H. You know what to do with your sadness. I've already told you.

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HEAR AUDIO CLIPS FROM THE SPINAL TAP INTERVIEW.