MEL BROOKSSPEAKS WITH ANGELINA JOLIE

VANITIES

The IMPOSSIBLE INTERVIEW

DAVID KAMP

BROOKS: Angie—Angelah. What you should've done is made a movie called Unchosen. About a Jew who only grows to five foot five. And ends up with this voice! "Chosen people," my tuchis!

JOLIE: Mel, I have nothing but respect for your track record, but the story of Louie Zamperini's spirit and resilience is one I felt compelled to tell.

BROOKS: Well, I'll see your Louie Zamperini and raise you one Melvin Kaminsky! I also soyved, sweetheart! Picture this: a shivering little pitseleh in 1944, sent over to the Ardennes to defuse land mines. Boy, I could've been mincemeat, Angie. Kosher mincemeat, mind you.

JOLIE: Thank you for your service, Mel. Did you know that Louie met Hitler at the Munich Olympics?

BROOKS: When Adolf was still on his way up.

JOLIE: The actual springtime for Hitler!

BROOKS: Not bad, sweetheart! So when will you finally do a comedy?

JOLIE: Well, my character in Maleficent was kind of—

BROOKS: A comedy.

JOLIE: That's a muscle I haven't really developed, maybe? So it'd be a challenge to—

PHILIP GALANES: We all face challenges. But then, taking them in stride is what makes us our best selves, isn't it?

JOLIE: Wait, who are you?

GALANES: I'm Philip Galanes of The New York Times, and this is "Table for Three." As I was saying, Angelina, all of us—you, me, Mel—we all...

BROOKS: Hang on, kid, whaddya mean, "we"? You're looking at an Oscar-winning actressdirector and a comedy legend! You're from a newspaper! Who let you in here?

JOLIE: I'll get security.

BROOKS: No, no, here's what we do, Angie. We let Galanes stay—but we stick him with the check!