PLANETARIUM

Et Cetera

Michael Lutin tells Scorpios not to eat their friends

SCORPIO OCT. 24-NOV. 21

Red-blooded Scorpios have an enormous appetite for prosperity—and for just about everything else. There’s certainly nothing wrong with that, but since your family is in total upheaval and your home life is completely disrupted, you are feeling pretty unstable at the moment. Be careful not to get carried away or become too greedy for your own good. As transiting Saturn retrogrades back into your 7th house for a few months, make an effort to remember that human beings need to be treated with patience and sensitivity. People are not ants, after all, and you are not an anteater.

SAGITTARIUS NOV. 22-DEC. 21

You’ve already discovered how comforting it can be to have someone support you and cheer you up when you’re down, and with Pluto and Chiron still in your sign, baby, have you been down. Nevertheless, as much as you may appreciate the joys of companionship, there is no way you can hand yourself over on a silver platter to anybody. You are so restless and jittery right now that you wouldn’t be able to stand still long enough to go through the ceremony, much less commit to the marriage itself. Then, too, there’s work, which could easily take over your whole life. So where can you run9

CAPRICORN DEC. 22-JAN. 19

Capricorns do not tend to be the sort of people who fling themselves into the service of humanity without first making sure that they will be getting a nice piece of change for their efforts. Recognition is always part of the deal, and if they can get their names over the title, that’s even better. Let’s just say that when members of your sign fall into the arms of Mother Church, they often end up wearing a big red hat. So while both Saturn in your 5th house and your aching heart are telling you to devote yourself to art and spirituality, don’t forget the money.

JAN. 20-FEB. 18

It should please you to learn that you are not now and never again X will be what you once were. Your current incarnation should be a source of relief and hope, since you are finally throwing off the shackles of your previous life and setting out on a new and exciting journey. At least that’s what New Age healers will tell you when they try to gloss over the fact that, as Uranus and Neptune sweep through your sign, only half of you is truly flying happily toward adventure, while the other half has fallen and can’t get up. For the time being, you’ll have to live somewhere between the two.

PISCES FEB. 19-MARCH 20

V If a genie were to pop out of a bottle and grant you your wish to flee to a tropical island with the fantasy lover of your choice, do you honestly think you could escape professional intrigue or the prying eyes of a nosy regime? Although there are a few people who give you butterflies because you still don’t have the guts to be real with them, Jupiter’s transit does grant you some measure of emotional calm right now, even if it doesn’t shield you completely from political infighting. Wheel and deal all you want, but guess what: in the end you will have to turn to prayer.

ARIES MARCH 21-APRIL 19

Of course you should have homes in Malibu, London, Marrakech, and anywhere else you happen to fancy escaping to this week. With Jupiter and Pluto in opposition in your 3rd and 9th houses, and Uranus and Neptune going direct in your 11th, the last thing you want is to be tied up with a job or tied down to a person. When planets transit fire and air signs, you simply cannot be riveted to one spot or held to your word for more than a weekend. Saturn, however, is returning briefly to an earth sign. That means, in plain English, that your freedom depends on your bank balance.

TAURUS A P R I L 2 0 - M AY 2 0

There are financial deals up for grabs, but the cosmic situation is too complex to predict any outcome. A lot depends on how willing you are to work with the people who make the decisions. The change in motion of the ruler of your 10th house demands that you update your tired old act and play ball. On the other hand, Saturn is still in Taurus, and it would be uncool to turn yourself inside out just to please the fickle mob. If you did, you’d look as silly as Queen Elizabeth II would if she showed up somewhere dressed like Jennifer Lopez. But it would make news.

GEMINI MAY 21-JUNE 21

When it comes to dealing with relationships, many Geminis have been tied to Pluto’s chariot and dragged through hell for months. Thank heaven Jupiter will be transiting your sign at least for the rest of the year. Soon you’ll be bouncing along laughing, without sustaining a scratch or feeling any pain. Furthermore, now that Uranus and Neptune are going direct in your 9th house, you’ve got many more options than you had a year ago. Still, there may be a bit more penance to do, so hang in there and pray for spring to come soon.

CANCER JUNE 22-JULY 22

Many Cancers make a career out of fretting, mainly because they see themselves as peaceful little crabs on the beach, and they view life as a great big bare foot that’s about to come down on them. Not that the planets haven’t been giving you plenty to fret about. There’s work (what are you going to do with your life?), and that pain in your side (was that a muscle spasm or is your liver gone?). If only you could live for the moment and remember that we are all just a bunch of cream pies going down the same conveyor belt. Once you face that, the rest is easy.

LEO JULY 23-AUG. 22

Although you may at times have found family intimacy so cloying and engulfing that you made a mad dash in the opposite direction, it’s a sure bet that all that safety and lazy coziness seem as attractive to you now as thoughts of home did to Scarlett O’Hara when she was stuck in Atlanta during the siege. This month is definitely the most socially challenging time of the year. With your 5th-and-llth-house axis buzzing, Uranus and Neptune going direct in your 7th house, and Saturn back in your 10th, you won’t be seeing Tara for a while. This is war.

VIRGO AUG. 23-SEPT. 22

All normal, well-adjusted adults living in the Western world are forced to juggle their personal and professional lives, Virgos included. Just because Jupiter and Pluto are in opposition in your 4th and 10th houses, there’s no need to get your stomach in knots and let your head explode from the tension. Be thankful that you’ve got enough energy to handle the load and that you’re healthy enough to be working. Speaking of health and work, quantum leaps are required now in both areas. If your system has been bugged since last February, debug it now.

LIBRA SEPT. 23-OCT. 23

While this month’s 12th-house transit of Mars could give you the chance to live out your fantasies in the Tunnel of Love, it could also turn into a trip through the House of Horrors if your mind is not in the right place. Fortunately, you are under the protection of Jupiter in your 9th house for the whole year, and it is therefore unlikely that you will lose your mind completely. Thanks to Uranus and Neptune, all you should be thinking about is partying, performing, and playing with kids. As an aside, do you suppose you could stop obsessing about sex and death for just five minutes?

To hear more about what’s happening in your horoscope—and everyone else’s—listen to Michael Lutin weekly by calling 1-900-28V-FAIR on a Touch-Tone phone. Cost: $1.95 per minute. If you are under 18, you need parental permission.